I've just gotten to this point in my life where no matter how hard anyone tries,
They'll never even begin to be able to fill this gigantic hole I've created inside.
So many people can only see so far,
While the rest of the entire populace is still stuck on superficial outer facades,
And there's no one I feel like I can truly depend upon.
And if I don't have anyone to depend on,
Then who'll be there to take my baton when life is ahead in the race?
Who will be my median?
I know I can exaggerate, profoundly so, but I also know that I can be extremely realistic.
I'm scared I won't be able to live up to the expectations I've created for myself,
And I'm scared that the hole I've created inside,
Will prevent me from ever building any true relationships with people.
I'm so intelligent and' I'm so capable, but it's almost as if I have so much going on,
That sometimes even reminding myself of that is a strain.
I'm not sure how to be optimistic when everything around me drives me down the opposite path.
How can you explain to someone of obvious lesser intelligence,
Of obvious lesser maturance, the extremities of your situation?
How can you unravel your whole life's problems on one person
Without damaging them in the process?
Is it so wrong that I hope to find someone that's just as fucked up as I am,
To defeat the possibility of gaining any amount of pity?
Dear lord, please don't let me be misunderstood.